This is an account of how an angry young man can cross the line that divides theoretical support for violence from a state of 'killing rage' in which the murder of neighbour becomes thinkable Over 3000 people have died in Northern Ireland since 1969 & most of them have died at the hands of their neighbours The intimacy of the Ulster conflict what it means to carry out a political murder when in all probability the victim is personally known or lives in a nearby street is described accurately by an honest participant The book does not attempt to soften the impact of the events it describes through euphemism or rhetoric It is a truthful picture of the brutality & waste caused by the IRA's unwinnable campaign & of its human consequences It is also a self-portrait of the despair & disintegration the hardening to conscience & grief that accompany political violence